| Lebanon is a country infested with a terrorist-run movement — Hezbollah — which is backed by muscular, murderous, utterly ruthless and terror-loving state patrons in both neighboring Syria, and Syria’s kissing cousin, Iran. (...) Lebanon is now being colonized by Iran and affiliates (...) The truth is that there will be no salvation for Lebanon until there is regime change in Iran. (...) That this does not now seem likely to happen does not change the reality it would be the right thing to do. |
Few of the Big Management Party’s foreign- and aggression-policy bozos can match the zeal, if not the credentials, [1] of neocomradess C. Rossett, from whom I thus extract and isolate the characteristic venom . She individually specializes in United Nations bashin’. Naturally she finds it a cinch to work a little of that ingredient into her Lebanese porridge [2]. Equally naturally, it cannot be an important ingredient, not when UNIFIL was regalvanized after the Thirty Day War of 2006 by none other than her own Boy and Dynasty and Party and Ideology. In Kosova or BiH, pretendin’ that the UN is an efficient cause and agent of Intergalactic Evil in its own right can be made plausible. Neocomrade Suleiman Steven Ahmad Schwartz takes that line frequently, and it is certainly not his fault that nobody but possibly a couple of his mothers-in-law gives a hoot what he scribbles. To blame UNIFIL for the difficulties of the Seedier Revolutionaries would be ridiculous, there are at least a dozen other candidates in line ahead of them, beginnin’ of course with their own best-belovèd selves. Anyway, we have already noted that this neocomradess prefers to blame the evil Qommies, with Damascus a distant second.
The preference simplifies her tasks of agitation and propaganda Best of all, it excuses her from learnin’ or knowin’ or carin’ about -- not to mention from twistifyin’ for journalism consumers and for her Party’s base and vile -- the Beirut statelet considered as a thing in itself. C. Rossett can treat the joint as a mere locus of Qommie infestation without reference to what it would be like if sane and healthy. This is very fortunate, since anybody who wanders into the details of that labyrinth may never emerge at all, and meanwhile is bound to bore journalism consumers in the holy Homeland to tears with far too much detail about far too tiny a subject-matter. [3] The neocomradess’s actual performance still leaves me, at least, wondering exactly why she should attach so much importance to so unimportant a question as "What’s wrong in Lebanon?" No doubt the Kiddie Krusaders mean to make everythin’ be swell everywhere on Planet Kennebunkport-Crawford sooner or later, yet even they make distinctions of importance from time to time, with, say, Patagonia and Saskatchewan listed well down the Big Managerial agenda from Sa‘údiyya and China, whatswrongwithwise. [4]
Exactly how much importance Big Management Party neocomradess C. Rossett attaches to Lebanon, and why she attaches it, are topics that we may discuss some other day, Mr. Bones. At the moment I am mainly struck by her view, one which the whole Party of Atwater seems to share insofar as it is capable of takin’ any interest in foreigners, that the God Party of Lebanon is of extraterrestrial origin, a group of "muscular, murderous, utterly ruthless and terror-loving" clients of Mars or West Neptune who had nothing to do with the body politic that they now infest before they started infesting it. The God Party being in Lebanon is thus conceived of as exactly parallel to the presence of the militant extremist GOP in the former Iraq; a complete break of cultural and political continuity has taken place. I suppose the general good news, if this phony Party baloney was anythin’ like accurate, would be that such political microbes could in principle be deported "home" where they belong, sent "straight back to where they came from." The neocomradess in residence has revealed, however, that if she has her druthers, there won’t be any home there for them when the microbes show up and expect to be taken in: "There will be no salvation for Lebanon until there is regime change in Iran."
It appears, then, that the Big Managers of Atwaterism logically must have in mind either (1) to murder all the God Party microbes once and for all, or else (2) to set the microbes up as a diffuse and stateless proletariat more or less comparable to that of Gentile Palestine, or perhaps to that of al-Qá‘ida. The former panacea strikes me as beyond the reach of even Sole Remainin’ Hyperpower. The alternative seems to be about as clear a case of the Kiddie Krusaders askin’ for future trouble as imagination can come up with.
"Logically" and Atwaterism do not always mix well, however. Consider the whole thrillin’ saga of Peaceful Freedumbia, Mr. Bones. Five years and more after V-IQ Day, 1 May 2003, "logically" and our aggressor faction remain scarcely on speakin’ terms. To expect Big Management to handle the Beirut statelet with the same Micawberite methodology that has brought them to where they are in Peaceful Freedumbia is much more reasonable than to anticipate anythin’ narrowly logical from them.
Why on earth should the Harvard Victory School MBA gentry start bein’ coherent and consequent now? Merely because the God Party microbes won an important round unexpectedly last week? Even if I swallowed Toynbee-esque "challenge and response" whole, Mr. Bones, I should hesitate to expect it to take such immediate effect as that. Neocomradess C. Rossett does not expect instant relief herself:
| As a prescription these days, regime change in Iran may of course sound quite useless and maybe even deranged — at least as far as it might require any input from the United States. Washington can still talk a good game, but on the ground — apart from following up in Afghanistan and Iraq — the administration has gone out of the regime-change business. In a statement last week on the fighting in Beirut, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice got most of the words right: “Backed by Syria and Iran, Hezbollah and its allies are killing and injuring fellow citizens, undermining the legitimate authority of the Lebanese government and the institutions of the Lebanese state.” O.K., but now what? Now, nothing. The policy of preemption, declared by Bush in 2002, ended with the toppling in 2003 of Saddam Hussein. |
Her Inresidenceship abuses the techincal term "preemption" a little bit, I fear, for it would be ludicrous to pretend that her today’s scribble is unconnected with the Rev. Nasralláh’s recent success. C. Rossett wants to retaliate, obviously, not to preëmpt. Since I adduce this neocomradess as a typical specimen of the Atwaterite mentality in its encounter with the Lesser Breeds Without, that fudge only makes her more suitable for my purpose, a better exemplar of what goes on where their brains ought to be. The whole Big Managerial aggression into the former Iraq was hormone-based retaliation implausibly pretendin’ to be brain-based preemption, after all, though to be sure that caper did not make much strictly logical sense under either rubric. The then Beast of Baghdád was not about to strike at Atwaterism and Western Sieve with forty-five-minute terror-tipped specials, and neither had he just struck with them. He was mostly just sitting there at a conveniently bombable address.
For the Little Brother of C. Rossett to bomb Qom and Tehrán just at the moment would not be so convenient. The weakest point in Her Inresidenceship’s scribble, me judice, is that it contains no discussion of this inconvenience, leaving the impression that her own empowered neocomrades are refusin’ arbitrarily and willfully to do what is obviously good policy as well as, naturally, Glorious and Virtuous and Brave.
What’s wrong at Rancho Crawford? [5]
_____
[1] "Claudia Rosett is a journalist-in-residence with the Foundation for Defense of Democracies."
The FuDD will be a sort of minor league whiffleball club for neocomrades unprepared to succeed as AEIdeologues and Hoovervillians and Heritagitarians. So minor that the funny side of "journalist in residence" eludes them. But Her Inresidenceship will do as a typical specimen just as well or even better for not bein’ a low-magnitude star.
[2]
| ... with an annual budget of $713 million, UNIFIL by various accounts has resumed its old routine in which Hezbollah stocks its arsenal, struts its guns, and UNIFIL observes. According to Lebanon’s An-Nahar newspaper, for instance, a UNIFIL patrol in late March tried to inspect a suspicious-looking truck in the Bekaa Valley. Up drove two vans carrying five men with assault weapons. The UNIFIL troops left. In a ritual U.N. response that won’t deflect a single bullet, U.N. Secretary-General Ban Ki-Moon called the encounter “worrying.” |
That shockin’ tale is a bit isolated and anecdotal even by Party of Atwater standards, but there is no doubt why the neocomradess wishes to agitate and propagandise with it.
[3] I speak of unaligned journalism consumers. C. Rossett’s fellow Atwaterites might even think she was deliberately sabotagin’ the Big Management Cause if she started to indicate how remarkably intricate the Beirut statelet is.
[4] Yes, of course, Mr. Bones, both Jewish Statism and the global supply of fossil fuel are focused not too far from the confines of Lebanon. Nevertheless, both the sentimental and the economic Mecca are clearly located on the far side of those confines. The joint itself possesses no Hyperzionists except of a polemical or honoris causâ type, and no rock oil whatsoever. If the libido dominandi crew were not so mentally muddled and prone to hobgoblinise themselves with Tom Clancy scenarios, they would care about Lebanon much less.
[5] The neocomradess supplies no clue at all what the hold-up may be. Any amateur Crawfordologist can guess that Little Brother’s handlers might be worried about international reaction to givin’ the evil Qommies a hasty course of Shock-’n’-Awe Therapy®, or about its impact on the succession of J. Sidney McCain, or even -- much less likely -- about what would actually take place in the Greater Levant afterwards.
Though perhaps I misunderestimate Little Brother’s radical Micawberism. It is not absolutely ruled out that the Harvard Victory School MBA’s suppose that they can actually solve the Palestine Puzzle between now and next January. Even for witless hormone-basers, that would be a stretch, but . . . . But God knows best!
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