The Quintessence of Blimpism

Of course, we all have political biases and innately different views about what brings about war and peace, making disagreement inevitable. And there is always a fog of war that makes it hard to determine the pulse of any ongoing battle. Yet the universal human desire to be associated in the here and now with the assumed winning side — and to shun perceived defeat — trumps them all. Throughout this war, that natural urge explains most of the volatile and shifting views of our politicians, pundits and media as they scramble to readjust to the up-and-down daily news from Iraq. And so it is with the latest positioning about the surge that to a variety of observers seems successful — at least for now.

Ah, that "universal human desire to be associated in the here and now with the assumed winning side," Mr. Bones! What's wrong with cranky you and me that we should fail to participate in Universal Human Desire and would only hate Party Agressions and Narcissistic Gland-Based Invasionisms even more bitterly if they actually, God forbid! worked?

For that matter, what's gone haywire in the internal circuitry of Rear-Colonel V.D.H. Blimp of AEI and Hooverville itself? What kind of a geistige Militärismus is this that natters on idly about "natural urge" and winnin' anywhichway bein' all that really counts? "Everything solid melts into air," General von Clausewitz embraces Neocomrade Karl Rove and hands over his sword in acknowledged defeat!

A very sad spectacle, Mr. Bones! Yet somehow we can watch the Boy-'n'-Party Show from afar and do at all feel at all tempted to participate. We can calmly take for granted that when Blimp's "assumed winning side" wins and then gets applauded by Blimp's "universal human desire to be associated," none of this sad and shabby neo-Blimpian hormone-based winnin' and associatin' filth pollutes us at all.

I'm quite as confident as you are, sir, but being a sort of amateur intellectual, I naturally wonder what exactly the grounds of our confidence are vis-à-vis all the Big Management Party's Blimps and other such assorted Persian apparatuses.

We can count on Princess Posterity in the long run, no doubt, but the long run is not here and now. To win back the Executive in '08 seems to depend more immediately upon Televisionland and the electorate, folks not likely to reject vile shameless neo-Blimpianity instantly as Princess Posterity and you and I do. One is not to dodge one's providentially appointed difficulties, Mr. Bones, and our difficulty at the moment is that three-quarters or so of the holy Homeland wouldn't see anything wrong with the GOP Kiddie Krusade if only it "worked". We may safely leave it to the MSM fiends to trumpet that Kiddie Krusadin' does seem not work de facto, that's as may be, but our cardinal problem, Bones, is that so many Holy Homelanders see no objection in principle to gland-based Kiddie Krusadin'.

Down to this have wombschoolin' and Niederdümmung reduced poor Uncle Sam! Only too easy to anticipate the adverse judgment of Princess Posterity and her court historians, and yet quite impossible to guess their account of how Uncle Sam eventually rallied and recovered from his post-September auto-terrorized GOP-fostered funk and then eventually went on to . . . !

Our attempted collaboration with Princess Posterity is rather a one-sided business, is it not, Mr. Bones? We humble assent to Her Ladyship's general principles, yet She Who Must be Obeyed never vouchsafes us even the slightest tip about any particular horse race!

God knows best.